Stop the Shadows news

Tips for disabled people wanting to find love

Tracy and Carl

Let’s be brutally honest, finding love when you have a disability is a bit of a nightmare, something which has been lovingly brought to light by a national charity.

According to Revitalise just 54.6% disabled people leave their homes less than 1-2 times a week for a social occasion.

It’s not only a case of finding that special someone, you have to find accessible venues to meet your physical requirements, meeting those who can see pass your disability and happy to provide extra support you may need and facing that stigma attached to being disabled.

So, instead of standing right in front of Cupid when he shoots that lovesick arrow to end your pitiful singledom life, how can you start a blossoming relationship?

Like for anyone else the best advice is to go to places where you can meet others. But as we know too well, thousands of people with disabilities are lonely and may not have anyone to go with. If you can relate to this check out apps like MeetUp - it’s an awesome service which could potentially change your life.

People living with learning disabilities or autism could do worse than taking a browse at the Luv2meetU dating service which provides online clubs and in-person meet-ups as well as activities and days out.

You probably have a sore finger swiping right on dating apps such as Tinder, but there are similar services for disabled people such as Disability Match and Abled Love. 

You probably also have an aching wrist - but, um, that’s not go there shall we?

Ok, so you have found someone you like, share a connection with - but what are the next steps?

Tracy and Carl [pictured above] met 17 years ago at a Revitalise holiday centre and been together ever since.

Carl's advice to finding your soulmate is: “Just talk to people and communicate with them. I would say just go and do it because otherwise you won’t get the chance. They’re all different people each time when you go on holiday to Sandpipers. Sorry for the expression, but you’ve just got to bite the bullet.”

Tracy said: “I’d say it’s good to chat with someone over Facebook first and then meet them in person. Go out to activities like bowling, respite and quizzes. Go with a friend or carer at first so you’re not alone.”

A good place to find additional advice, especially for people with learning disabilities, is the Enhance website which offers Disability and Sexual Expression Training and The Love Lounge, where people with disabilities can get confidential advice on love, sex and relationships.

[ Support ABLE2UK campaign highlighting loneliness in the disabled community by using the hashtag #StopTheShadows ]

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