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Kidman reveals she suffered depression

Nicole Kidman
Nicole Kidman Image credit: variety.com

Nicole Kidman has revealed she went through an emotional tough time when she played the part of writer Virginia Woolf in The Hours.

The 2002 movie focused on the acclaimed author struggling with her mental health when she was writing her novel Mrs Dalloway, but ironically Kidman was battling depression herself during filming.

Kidman, 54, told BBC Radio 4’s The Cultural Life: 'I don't know if I ever thought of the danger, I think I was so in her.

'I mean, I put the rocks in my pocket and walked into the river. Over and over again. I probably don't consider danger enough.

'And I think I was in a place myself at that time that was removed, depressed, not in my own body.

'So the idea of Virginia coming through me, I was pretty much an open vessel for it to happen.

'And I think Stephen (Daldry, the film's director) was very delicate with me because he knew that.'

Nicole refused to go into detail about her mental health struggles, but went on to say she had been through similar experiences since an early age.

'I was open to understand it, which I think is probably the beauty of life as an actor,' she said.

'There's a point where you're like, oh, I have so many experiences now.

'I've delved and traversed many different landscapes of mental health and loss and ideas and joy and raised birth and you know, life is what it is.

'It's far more examined for me now than when I was 14.

'I'm definitely in it. I'm definitely feeling it and definitely aware of the preciousness of it and the time. The other extraordinary thing I'm very aware of is I'm around and exposed to some of the greatest minds in the world.

'I'm the recipient of their focus. I'm grown by them, I'm taught by them, I'm shaped by them, and I'm seen by them, and that is, that is a beautiful, beautiful journey to be on.

'I hope it still continues, but I value it. I don't take any of that for granted and I know what it is. I try to stay in that place. I definitely don't want to shut down as I get older. I want to become rawer, and more open, more available and freer.'

Nicole Kidman won best actress for her role in The Hours at The Oscars in 2003.