JUST A CONSPIRACY.

Muse sell out The O2 Arena .

Published: 17th November 2009

If you have read any interview with Muse the chances are you may have the impression that the three Devonshire lads, how can we put this gently?...They don't entirely have both feet firmly placed on Planet Earth. They seem to have ideas above any sane human's expectations. They believe in parallel universes and are no stranger to conspiracy theories. Ah, conspiracies, our get-out clause for our difficult entry piece to the review we are about to write. Let us go into detail.

This is the truth, no matter how bizarre it may sound. We have a conspiracy theory of our own and it goes a little something like this. Nobody exists in this universe apart from us. Our friends, our family, Jedward - They don't exist. For this reason if we don't witness an event, it never happened. Last nights Top Gear, we didn't watch. So it never happened. Even though our mate watched it, he doesn't exist - So it never happened. Our friends and family only exist in a figment of our own personal imagination. So when we spend time with our love ones as soon as we leave them, they don't exist. In this case the first thirty minutes of the Muse concert at The O2 Arena last Friday night - Never took place. The band didn't open with Uprising. We didn't miss the spectator laser light display accompanying New Born which we later saw photographed in NME a day later, the only copy of NME in existence, of course. And the first song Muse played wasn't their forth of the evening. For this very reason alone the concert started with Map of the Problematique.

The space aged mechanical stage lifted Matt, Christopher and Dominic to insignificant levels throughout their performance on spasmodic raising platforms (described by Matt as 'Utilitarian-Style Buildings) filmed above on a concertinaed screen. The piano riffs to United States Of Eurasia were played by Matt towering over his band mates at a vertigo level of bewilderment. Their first single, Cave ridged the band safely back to ground level.

Dominic's drums were battered to oblivion through Helsinki Jam rotating three hundred and sixty degrees so the audience above seated behind the stage could eventually see a band members face.

The impeccable notes to Undisclosed Desires were lifted by a stunning laser display which desiderated into tiny molecules accompanying their 2006 release, Starlight before falling through black holes and other revelations. More dazzling displays came from above where balloons containing confetti showered the auditorium sound tracked by Plug In Baby.

With just four more tracks until the after show drink celebrations Time Is Running Out and Unnatural Selection closed the first Symphony. The Encore itself accumulated in the only way a Muse encore could, with the Knights of Cydonia.

The Arena started to empty, the two thousand fans made their way out onto the O2 forecourt to make their safe journeys home. Of course, they didn't. They never existed in the first place and as for the Stadium show Muse have just announced for next September, providing we manage to wangle a ticket the concert will go ahead. If we don't. Don't bother going. Wembley stadium won't be there. There will be no gig. In a matter of fact, you don't exist. Nothing does - Except us!

THE SET LIST...

Uprising  
Resistance  
New Born
Map of the Problematique  
Supermassive Black Hole
MK Ultra  
Interlude  
Hysteria  
Nishe
United States Of Eurasia  
Cave
Guiding Light  
Helsinki Jam
Undisclosed Desires  
Starlight  
Plug In Baby
Time Is Running Out  
Unnatural Selection
Exogenesis: Symphony, Part 1: Overture
Stockholm Syndrome  
Knights of Cydonia