Where the hell do we begin? Is it the bit where we rubbed shoulder with 3 A-List celebrities at the same time? Is it when we were escorted backstage by some Brit Awards winners? or is it when Justin Hawkins gave us his invites for a party overlooking the whole of London? Tell you what, to make life easier, let's start from the very beginning, it's 4.15pm at Earls Court 2, February 17th 2004 and ABLE2UK has just arrived at the BRITS.

THE AWARDS

We first make a be-line to the Platinum table area where celebrities (The Darkness, Missy Elliot etc.). VIP's (Record Company executives and their favorite members of staff). Has-been who are so bloody desperate to get back in T limelight they spend 2 weeks o a Reality TV Show (Peter Andre) are tucking into to their bangers and mash, the chosen meal for this year! The floor is divided into four quarters A-D. The A area is for the big-nobs, B area for the nominees and performers and as for the C and D areas - well, who cares!

The only band without a tale was Duran Duran who were apparently so damn busy doing press backstage the poor fellas had no time to wine and dine front of house. They did, however take advantage of the three course meals being served backstage in the artist bar. With the absence of Simon Le Bon and his fellow band members this left a certain Justin Timberlake one of the biggest names at the table area, also being the most difficult to meet. Justin was surrounded by minders who made you quiver just by an evil stare if anyone got within breathing distance - we write from experience!

No-one was going to get near the Timberlake, except if they followed him to the loo, dodged his bouncers and corner him on his way out! So we did just that! He signed the ABLE2 Book and told us that he wasn't sure which party he was attending. His 'boys' - N*E*R*D were playing up the road at Hammersmith Apollo and having an after-show party at the venue, although Justin was also tempted by the Duran Duran party, especially as he was given the honor to present them with a Lifetime achievement later in the evening.

After letting Justin escape back to his seat we continued our table domination and bumped into Avid Merrin ( this was our second meeting with the Bo Selcta star this week, the first being at the NME Awards). Avid was jumping over the railings to speak to his chums at BMG Records, who incidentally released his Christmas Single last year! Peter Andre somehow managed to weave his way into the A seating sector, leaving fellow Jungle mate, Lord Brockett back in the B section. Although it was Kerry McFadden who once again won over the other Get Me Out Of Here.. Contestants as she presented an award.

A highlight for us was being at Busted's table when it was announced that the boys had won their second Brit. We were caught up in the hugging marathon on the Universal Table when Matt, Charlie and James were becoming ecstatic.

The show ended with The Darkness rocking Earls Court on a high raised platform and pyrotechnics being fired across the crowd in the same way Beyonce had earlier for her duet with Outkast. As the award ceremony came to a grand finale the night was just starting and guests were plotting their parties for the night ahead and trying to grab a Duran Duran invite, which were like gold-dust.

THE PARTIES

THE MASTERCARD PARTY

Each year Mastercard, who sponsors the awards, hold the Official Brit Party at Earls Court and this year was no exception. The party theme was Heaven and Hell.

Heaven was on the balcony level of the specially designed party area draped with white sheets and two paying bars. For the lucky angels who managed to creep in the VIP Mastercard area (us!) didn't have to open their wallets to get a drink. One confusing thing though was if the area was meant to be the land of good, opposed to evil - what the fuck was Sophie Ellis Bextor doing there?

Hell was a small labyrinth of interlocking rooms with a casino and tables where devils could chill out and share their Brit tales with one another.

BACKSTAGE

After enjoying a few drinks on Mastercard we were taken backstage with Busted! The lads showed us the dressing rooms, each personalized indicating the guest who had been inside earlier that evening. Radio One and ITV had their own studios whilst all other press reporters had to settle with a room in the next building away from the celebrities. ABLE2UK was the only press allowed backstage! We had steak and chips in the artist bar, which was still busy with staff workers and award winners, The Darkness. The rock band were about to jet off to Germany, leaving them no time to attend their record label party (EastWest) so they gave us their invites! Kate Thorton was also boycotting parties and we ended up with her Duran Duran invites. With another three parties to attend and the now impractical Kensinginton Roof Garden invite we left Earls Court 2 in search of the EastWest party.

EASTWEST PARTY

It was pretty easy to find the 'secret' venue which had the UK press (including us) trying to track down all afternoon. It wasn't the tall tower right next to Earls Court that gave it away, nor the Security guys outside - it was the huge 'Darkness and Missy Elliot' logos being projected onto the tower!

The party took place on the top floor and needed two lifts to reach. Although when we finally reached the party the view was spectacular. Overlooking the city we could see the BT Tower, the Millennium Eye and every street light. The floor was revolving giving seated guests such as The Sun's Dominic Moran a chance to appreciate the sights without moving their arses.

There was a lack of celebrities, as mentioned, The Darkness had a plane to catch and Missy Elliot had her own party in town. So after a few free drinks it was time to move on and track down Duran Duran.

DURAN DURAN PARTY

Adam Street was the place to be after the awards and if you made it through the tight security you were about to be treated to one of the most exclusive parties ever.

We bumped into pissed Simon Le Bon straight away, he was mingling with all the invited guests, who had to pay for drinks! Although ten minutes later we managed to have a seat at Justin Timberlake's table, rubbing shoulders with Gwen Stefani and Alicia Silverstone. We were surrounded by Justin's security guards and overheard Just admitting to Alicia that even he believes they can be a bit over the top sometimes! He was chatting about loads of irrelevant stuff - Justin fans- he loves elephants!!

Band members of Duran Duran spasmodically appeared at the table to be praised by Justin on their 'remarkable performance' earlier in the evening.

Other guests at the party included our new mates Busted and fresh from presenting the whole show, Cat Deeley. Who incidentally we earlier met in the backstage bar at Earls Court.

With the time knocking on at 1.30am we decided to leave and try to cram in the Beyonce bash before last orders were called.

BEYONCE PARTY

The Embassy Club hosted the Beyonce Party, without Beyonce! The diva didn't make an appearance, but we manage to spot King Of Liggers, Dean Gaffeny in the VIP room unsurprisingly trying to chat up some poor helpless girl.

The girl would had been better off downstairs dancing to the funky disco music blasting out from the speakers.

There you have it, THE BRITS 2004. Same time next year then?